Yell Fireeeeeeeee (and then run)

Reading Toni's post where she likened herself to a mixture of Frank Spencer and Bridget Jones, I couldn't help but recognise myself in her words. You see, I too am cursed with clumsy. And look, I'm sure people say that all the time.. but really, I am the clumsiest, most accident prone person you'll ever meet. I currently have a big, round graze on my knee the size of a fifty cent piece to attest to that fact.

I fall over around 85% of the time - find me a set of stairs, a ditch, heck just even some perfectly flat road and I'll find a way. Basically the more public it is, the more likely I am to fall in/on/over it. I once took an innocent cleaner down with me as I grabbed frantically for something to stabilise myself. Sorry!

(found at we heart it)

I also drop food down the front of my clothes a lot. Last week I managed to fling a piece of Chicken Tikka Massala off the table and onto my sweet blue, polka dot skirt. Today, I dropped a strawberry on one of the few white spaces on my dress - it's 90% black, but of course the strawberry had its sight's set on one of those few, pristine white patches.

It's a burden, this being clumsy, because you expend so much energy just trying to stay up-right and dignified. So you can understand my surprise, my horror, at my appointment to Fire Warden at work.
It hasn't been six month since I last caught fire (literally) and I'm prone to panicking, so surely this isn't in the interest of public safety?

And this is a picture of me, as Fire Warden, fleeing the building at the first sign of trouble.